The Past Will Set You Free

There’s a bunch of quotes being circulated about how we shouldn’t live in the past.

I think they’re all bunk.

Okay, not really. But I spend the majority of my time living in the past: reading old family journals, scouring black and white pictures, drooling over antiques, listening to my Nat King Cole Pandora Station, watching old movies.

It used to be just something that made me happy, but lately, it’s becoming more of a way of life. I find solace in the past -the music is safe, the movies are safe. I don’t have to hide my kids’ eyes or my own eyes or do any kind of fast forwarding. I can just let the music play and let the movies run… there’s comfort in them. They make me feel warm. They make me feel home.

Today will be no different.

My life lately has been a rapid succession of hurried things. My phone is ringing like crazy, my front door seems to be revolving, and my ten month old can’t understand why I’m not holding her all of the time.
(Actually, it’s a good question. She’s VERY cute.)

But today. This morning.
Life has slowed down. My phone is silent. My door is closed. My computer is singing with Etta Fitzgerald. I’m wearing a sweater.
My birds are softly singing along to the music.

In a few minutes, I’ll bake something.
And this afternoon, I’m going to pull my entire family together for homemade popcorn, hot chocolate with mini-warshmallows (Trenton’s special name for them), and an old movie.

The theme for today will be CALM SURRENDER, black and white style.

Because after the weekend is over, my phone will ring again. The present will manifest itself, and in that moment I will either regret or rejoice.
I’d rather rejoice in spending my weekend all wrapped up in my family, muted trumpets, and homemade goodies than regret that I accomplished anything else.

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