A Pebble and Our Family Photos

“A pebble held close to the eye appears to be a gigantic obstacle. Cast on the ground, it is seen in perspective. Likewise, problems or trials in our lives need to be viewed in the perspective of scriptural doctrine. Otherwise they can easily overtake our vision, absorb our energy, and deprive us of the joy and beauty the Lord intends us to receive here on earth. Some people are like rocks thrown into a sea of problems. They are drowned by them. Be a cork. When submerged in a problem, fight to be free to bob up to serve again with happiness.”
~Richard G. Scott

My pregnancy isn’t a problem.
It’s not.

But I’m treating it like one. I have it held so close to my eye that nothing else is getting through… I think it’s natural, what with being RIGHT at the end of the whole thing, and to be honest: I don’t know how to NOT treat it like a pebble held close to my eye right now.
A friend of mine who recently gave birth once said, “You know when you’re about to give birth that you’re about to bring an absolutely pure and perfect angel into your home, and you want everything to be prepared and perfect.”

She’s so right.

I’m driving myself and my family crazy… my only saving grace is a woman in my OB’s waiting room who was about as pregnant as I am and twice as grouchy.
My husband only needed a few minutes with her to realize that maybe his own wife wasn’t the worst thing that ever happened to him.
She was an unlikely tender mercy.

Because I’m at the end, my piano students have slowly dropped off… which is good! I need to be done teaching for a while. I’ll pick it back up in a few months.
BUT.
I’m also dying for a prenatal massage and a reflexology foot massage from my Granny.
And I need to run to the store for cashews and almonds so I can make my mom’s granola.
Oh! and I also found this great homemade Mother’s Milk tea -I could make it on my own!
… IF I just had a little more cash.

But of course I’m due to have a baby right during the Christmas season, and said baby has needed a few expensive items bought for her because her older two siblings wore through a few necessary things in their first little years.
And of course the truck broke down.
All of that adds up to something like:
Massages aren’t exactly a priority. Mothers HAVE had babies without them, you know.

And I know, I KNOW that this baby will come when she comes. And I also know that everything will be fine and perfect. Babies have a way of transforming the environment around them.

Last year, I was insanely busy about this time. I was planning a benefit dinner and auction and I was working on the annual Primary Program (which I’d never done before). One day, my husband came home from work and I flew out the door.
“Heybabe*kiss*hopeyouhadagreatdayIwillberightbackthere’ssnacksonthecounterthanksbye*doorslam*!”
And I was off -I had a million errands to run and my mind was flying with Things That Needed Doing.
I worked my way around our little town, and as I came to the end of my list I made a drive to my friend Charlsye’s house. She had, just weeks before, given birth to twins.
I knocked on her door, and she let me in.
The SECOND I walked through her door, I was enveloped in peace and calm. I could feel the love that permeated the walls of her home, and even though I had planned to simply run the errand I needed to and jump right back in my car to run the next, I found myself sitting on her couch and just… taking it all in.
I held each of the tiny babies, and listened to their older brothers tell me all about them.
It was sweet -no other word for it.

On days like today and yesterday, I like to remember my friend Charlsye. I like to think of her home and her children and the peace and calm.
I know that no matter WHEN my baby comes, it will be the right time whether there’s a massage or not.
I know that even if my dishes aren’t done and even if the carpets aren’t clean and even if I don’t have granola… the baby will come and she will be wonderful and pure and perfect and for a few blissful weeks, my house will be utterly calm.
Dad will be home.
Everyone will be sleepy.
It will be cold outside and warm inside, and for a few brief weeks, our baby girl will bind our family together in the sanctity of our home.
We will eat frozen dinners, and we will sanitize everything in sight.

For the last four years, I’ve grown accustomed to my family. It’s been US. The FOUR of us. I have a hand for each child. I have a girl. I have a boy.
I have treasured these stay-at-home years where there’s been no school schedule and nothing to keep us from staying up until midnight if we wanted to and nothing to keep us from going to the big city on a whim…
Those days are gone. I wanted to capture Us Before Baby -I want to remember our family and the way we were before our lives changed forever with the addition of Baby Girl. Once she’s born, I’ll be capturing MORE memories, more moments… but for now. For NOW.
I need pictures of my son dressed as Captain America, and I need pictures of my daughter dressed as a princess. I need pictures of what I look like when I’m pregnant and I need pictures of our pet parakeet.
I need pictures of “Little Bitty Mousie” and I need pictures of my husband and I lounging on the couch together.
I need pictures of us playing and pictures of us laughing.

Mostly, I need these pictures so that I can look at them and remember that The One that is Coming is not a Problem to be tackled with to-do lists. She’s simply a growing part of our fun family.
I need to relax.
(A massage would help that, right? Haha.)

How appropriate that today -of all days -my DVD of family pictures should show up on my doorstep (hand delivered. Small towns are the best). As I scrolled through the pictures, I relaxed.  My Aunt Cat has a great eye for photography, and she was nice enough to come snap pictures for us.
I love us. I’m so grateful for the kind of husband I have and the amazing children I’ve been given.
I know that if we can survive the last few weeks of this pregnancy together, we can survive ANYTHING. Seriously.

When our little Lacy was born, we wanted a “Baby’s first Christmas” ornament, but the only one we could afford was a tiny little $2 one from Target. We were thrilled to see they still had the same style the next year when we had our little man jump on the scene. I wonder if they still have them this year?

Our favorite book:

Our favorite bird:

Favorite friends:

I was nervous that taking nice family pictures in our own living room wearing the clothes we normally wear around the house might be… I don’t know, lacking in taste? But I love them so much. They aren’t lacking in taste, no matter how many of us are wearing costumes or sweats or sporting bare feet.
Aunt Cat did save one awkward picture for me, and I’m so glad she did. I laughed so hard when I saw it:

Now.
For some reason, my blog won’t let me upload the pictures straight from my disc, so I had to upload them to picmonkey and save them from there… also: I wanted to make them into collages to make it easier to view them. It took me awhile, and I’m sort of waiting for someone to come ’round and pat my back.
“You did it, you did it, you did it, YAY!”
Here’s my boys playing -it’s one thing that won’t change after the baby gets here! They’re my only TWO boys!

The minute I saw this picture of everyone’s hands on my belly, I felt a sense of the peace I talked about earlier… I keep looking at the picture and telling myself to settle down. Stop obsessing. Lie down, watch a movie, crochet…

I do love to crochet. Right now I’m working on a blanket for baby sister. I crocheted a blanket for my first born. I sewed a rag quilt for my second born, and it’s only right that she should have her own too! I’m hoping to get this done to take to the hospital with me… I’m using two strands of yarn at once (extra thick for this cold weather!) and I’m using a basket weave stitch.
Here’s us doing what we do.
I love Danny Deets. Have I ever told you that?

Girls at play: (what in the world are we going to do with all of her Polly Pockets when the baby starts crawling and putting them in her mouth? I guess the question I should be asking is: Who wants to tell the girl that her Pollies are taking a vacation in a few months?)

Cat was nice enough to let us change our clothes into something a little more matchy-matchy and take some outside pictures. It had actually lightly snowed a few times the day we took our pictures. We were all freezing and it was windy, but Aunt Cat braved it AND the pictures look AMAZING!

I know I said I would relax, but I think I might just make our Christmas cards instead… these pictures are too much fun to not play with!

I wish I could make perfect collages so I didn’t have to crop some of the pictures to fit, but I’m not tech-savvy enough.

I’m just grateful for these priceless gems… they serve to remind me of a time in my life I’ll never get back -one that I love and treasure -one in which my children think I’m amazing and they laugh at my jokes and stories and crazy faces -one in which my husband and I lived out our twenties -one in which we came together in love, in laughter, and in costume.

This little girl is going to be so loved it’s ridiculous -even if I don’t manage to get the fridge completely cleaned out, or all of the pumpkins baked, mashed and frozen, or the hall closet cleaned out, or or or

or

or…