15 Weeks

The grandest thing happened two nights ago: my husband felt the baby flutter. You can actually feel the little one moving if I hold really still, push a hand firmly against my belly, and wait patiently. The Patient was patient and was greatly rewarded.
I’m feeling much, much better… now the only thing plaguing me is guilt for not working out every morning like I used to. I need to get ON that. I’ve got a rather painful marathon coming up in December and I need to train for it.
I can’t get enough seafood, and I wish I could afford to eat it all day. What’s more, I wish I was allowed to eat it everyday, but you know what they say: too much mercury for mom means a crazy baby, or something like that.
I still need insane amounts of sleep, and I’m still having insane dreams.
We should be able to find out what we’re having next month unless I talk my husband into a quick jaunt into the BIG city to get a fun ultrasound to find out sooner.
This pregnancy has been so different in so many ways, and I’m vowing to do the things I haven’t done before: take pictures every week no matter what I look like, get professional maternity pictures taken, and get an ultrasound done -just for fun.
I’ve come to grips with the reality that I’ll never be able to decorate a nursery for any of my children. When I had the space with my first baby, I didn’t have the money. Since then, I’ve had two kids in one room and again: not enough money. With this baby coming into a 2-bedroom abode, I’m running into the same brick wall: no nursery for baby. It makes me sad when I browse baby things online and see a perfectly organized and decorated nursery. My nesting instinct wants to be ALL OVER that, but I have to pacify it with crocheting and mopping. I used to make me really sad, and dare I say it? really jealous of other gorgeous nurseries.
And then one day, I just didn’t care anymore. Would it be fun? Sure, yeah. Is the baby going to notice or care? Oh, definitely not. Will it live on despite a lack of coordinating bedding and wall decor? Somehow, I think it will. Somehow. My husband and I have other financial goals in mind, given that we’re saving like mad knowing that we can’t live forever in a 2-bedroom house, if for no other reason that when my kids get to be teenagers we will have to separate the boys from the girls.
Or boy from the girls.
Or boys from the girl.
All I know is that while we are saving like mad, it’s important to spend money on priceless things like maternity pictures and newborn pictures. I learned that the hard way: by never getting them done and regretting it forevermore. Do I regret not having nurseries for my older two children? Not a lick. The picture situation? I’m just sick about it… the same way I’m sick about not getting professional wedding pictures taken. But that’s another post for another day.